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July 2009 Marketing Archives

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Funniest Jobs on Craigslist

Over the past few weeks Shannon has been perusing the jobs section of Space Coast Craigslist in an effort to help out a family member in need of a full time gig. During the process of finding local jobs she's uncovered some real unique positions. Since it's a holiday weekend I thought I might share some of them to help you get the weekend kicked off right.

Note: The following jobs are actual jobs that were posted on the Space Coast Craigslist jobs board, no joke.

From the "TV Video Radio Jobs" Section
Position: Film Personalities for Social Art Movie
Job Description: and women to participate in a filmed interview regarding pornography and the state of today's society. This is not a porn, there will be absolutely no nudity or otherwise offensive content or behavior. Applicants should watch pornography...

Pay: $150/session
Hmmm, it's not a porno but you're required to watch pornos, interesting.

From the "TV Video Radio Jobs" Section
Position: Female Model
Job Description:
Internationally awarded photographer still needs some female models for artistic nudes. Experience is not necessary but helpful. Nice body and face is an asset. Great body and face is better, but not necessary.
Sounds like a Hooters lawsuit just waiting to happen ;)

From the "Web / Info Design" Section
Position: WEB DEVELOPMENT, DYNAMIC CONTENT, Partnership needed!
Job Description:
...looking for a young, talented, dedicated web programers with big goals...Serious college students and recent grads welcome to apply, but you must have a website displaying your work and skill-sets...

Compensation: Partnership, with goals of becoming a corporation

No joke, this guy (Leo Cortes) is looking for web designers and developers to work for free and maybe he'll incorporate the entity and then he might pay these developers. Where do I sign up?

From the "Web / Info Design" Section
Position: Jr. Web designers
Job Description: Posted in response to a job posting for junior web designers.
What is it with people who think Photoshop MASTERY and HTML/CSS MASTERY equals low pay?.

If you're looking for a student hire or really a junior web designer, which really isn't even a position, then don't ask for mastery of photoshop and html/css. Do you know how long it has taken me and other pros to become photoshop masters? 40-45K isn't bad for a student hire or beginning web person full time, but it doesn't pay for a master. C'mon, stop trying to pay nothing for something, this isn't ebay.

I thought this was a job board, not a job reply board.

Best Craigslist Job Titles
Here are some of the best job titles I came across, seriously, I can't believe people post this stuff.
  • LOW BUDGET, LARGE PROJECT (I'll pay you less than anyone else, guaranteed!)
  • Low Budget Adult websites needed (as opposed to high class adult web sites)
  • Web Log "Blog" - Wordpress Design Project (not to be confused with we blog)
  • Part Time (Seriously this is the title, just Part Time, nothing more.)
  • respond to responds (respond now)
  • Handyman Technician SCAM (scam is an acronym, and a bad one at that)
  • E-Cig Account Executives (virtual non-smokers need not apply)
  • Young, aggressive salespeople needed (the meaner the better)
  • Self-Generating Sales Pro Needed (translation: if you don't make any sales then be your own customer)
  • new company (but same old job)
  • NAIL TECH For a day (as opposed to Doctor for a day)

And the list goes on. No wonder is still in business. Have a happy 4th of July everyone.

Funniest Jobs on Craigslist By Jason Dowdell at 04:48 PM
Comments (1)

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Downsizing, The Economy and 4ft x 8ft Whiteboards

four 4ft by 8ft porcelain white boardsFrom the title you've probably already figured out how downsizing is related to the economy but are unable to tie 4ft x 8ft whiteboards into the picture. It's quote simple really but first I need to give you a bit of background. During the past two years I have gone from two f/t employees, to 15 employees and now down to one employee. People keep saying that the economy is to blame and that good people are being hurt by the economy and they point the finger everywhere except for where it deserves to be pointed... righ at me. Yes, I'm the one to blame for the demise of Labitat as an seo consulting company and I take full responsibility for that. Over the next couple of months I'll share some insight with you about how I broke business 101 rules left and right and how I'm paying the price for it now so you can avoid those same pitfalls.

Now getting back to the title, first off I've downsized Labitat drastically. Like I said earlier, it has gone from 15 employees to just me and even I'm not really a full time employee (since I haven't received a paycheck in close to 9 months). Secondly, the economy has nothing to do with an seo consultancy failing. SEO is the boom business in every down economy. I started my last seo firm (Global Promoter) back in 2002 when the economy was still in the dot-Bomb slump and it went gangbusters. Everyone is looking for the most cost-effective way to get new customers through their doors and seo is the cheapest, most-effective way of doing so behind word of mouth referrals. Now the 4 foot by 8 foot whiteboards. That's where the real story of the economy comes into play.

4ft x 8ft Whiteboards Represent Real World Businesses
This week I have been liquidating all of the crap that's been lying around the office. From ethernet cables to mice and from desks to adding machines, I'm getting rid of all of it. During the process I've tried to get rid of the 4 ceramic whiteboards I have in the conference room since I'll be moving out of the office at the end of July. Everyone loves the whiteboards but they all answer me with the same response... The whiteboards are great and we'd love to buy one but we don't have room. We're working from our home and the room we're working in doesn't have enough room for a full size whiteboard.

Did you see that or did you miss the connection. Small business owners today are far more likely to start or run their business out of their house than ever before. Even me, my company has been around for nearly 4 years and I'm headed home to work from the sewing slash spare bedroom slash office at my house. I'm cutting costs left and right and don't want to go bankrupt because I owe people money and I'm going to make good on my debts and that means getting rid of absolutely everything that doesn't help me generate revenue. The only reason I got an office in the first place was to accomodate all of the out of towners and employees that I had to hire to keep up with the workload that we no longer have.

So if you want a stock tip, don't buy stock in any company who's primary business is whiteboards. There are far more small businesses than there are large businesses in the world and right now they don't have the room for 4ft by 8ft whiteboards.

Downsizing, The Economy and 4ft x 8ft Whiteboards By Jason Dowdell at 10:32 AM
Comments (1)

July 2009 Week 2 »

  • Week 1 (2 entries) July 1-4
  • Week 2 (3 entries) July 5-11
  • Week 3 (1 entries) July 12-18
  • Week 4 (0 entries) July 19-25
  • Week 5 (0 entries) July 26-31

Downsizing, The Economy and 4ft x 8ft Whiteboards
Interested in the boards. Great post too. ~Jason...
by Jason Vance
Funniest Jobs on Craigslist
what about the "pimp ass" tatoo ...
by shannon Dowdell

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