Thursday, February 16, 2006

Cheezy Entrepreneur Dale Begg-Smith Wins Olympic Gold

I guess i'm a dreamer. I'm a guy with his head in the clouds. I go about my daily routines believing that some cosmic force greater than us all is keeping balance in the universe. I think that murderers that have escaped justice are eaten by bears and that burglers who have evaded law enforcement can only find work on the set of According to Jim.

I suppose i know better, but ignorance is bliss.

Then something like this jumps up in my face and forces me to accept the fact that life isn't fair. That's right, Dale Begg-Smith, a freestyle skier and Internet innovator, won the gold in moguls skiing at the Winter Games in Turin, Italy.

Let me clear something up, the "Internet innovator" is the owner of a web pop-up ad company and worth $40 million. Do you hate him yet? Have I mentioned this tool drives a $300,000 Lamborghini?

The man dubbed "Spam Man' by his Australian bretheren has a vast fortune aquired by annoying every single computer-using drone in the world. Look around the cube farm and find your most annoying co-worker. Is it the guy who never cleans out the microwave after his leftover lasagna splatters everywhere? Is it the lady who sells Pampered Chef? Well multiply their annoyingness by roughly a thousand and you get this guy. Not only should he not have won a gold medal, he should have been clubbed by a baby seal.

Australia has a storied history of giving us undeserving celebrities. But at least Men at Work and Paul Hogan vanished into obscurity after they favored us with A Land Down Under and Crocodile DundeeI, II & III, respectfully.

I suppose the balance of good and evil has joined the counter-clockwise direction of their toilet water in being completely out of wack.

Posted By Jason Dowdell at 11:29 AM
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